Elayna
Laynie's Tribute
Elayna Leighann Gorsky was a fighter even before she was born. The odds were stacked against her, but she was destined to be one of our little miracle babies.
At the end of July I was told that the doctors believed that there were some chromosomal problems with my babies. We were told that Laynie would probably only live a couple of hours to a couple of weeks if she survived birth, and Eddie's chances were slim as well. We were reminded that ultrasounds are just pictures and we wouldn't know anything for sure until the babies were here, but that we needed to be preparing ourselves for the worst: that we might lose both of our babies. However, we also began to pray relentlessly that God would preform a miracle in their lives. We prayed nonstop. I often would find that I had fallen asleep while praying and when I woke up, I would start praying all over again. I told God that I knew what the doctors had said, and if that was his will, then I knew he had a purpose for it. I also reminded him of his promises to give us a future and a hope, and I begged him for the lives of my babies. One night, I told God I didn't understand why he would let me carry these babies for so long just to take them away from me. I cried out to God. I told him it wasn't fair for him to take my babies away from me before I ever got a chance to have them myself. That's when he gently reminded me that they weren't really my babies at all. They were his, and he was just loaning them to me. The hardest thing I ever did was to give God my babies when I hadn't even gotten them myself, but God promised me that night that he had a plan, and I that I just needed to trust him.
The babies came at 11:56 am on August 7th. Laynie was born weighing 1 pound 10 ounces and she was about 12 3/4 inches long. There were no physical signs of any deformations. God had given me my miracle babies.
Laynie slowly grew and got better in the NICU. After 3 months, she was able to go home. She was a happy little baby. She loved to play with Eddie, play football on the computer with Daddy, and talk to Mommy while sitting on the couch. However, her health did not last. She was in and out of the hospital several times and constantly sick. We began praying again. As she got weaker and weaker, we asked God again for another miracle. God answered that prayer, but not the way we had hoped. On January 15th, I held my baby girl for the last time. Bill and I sang her songs of love, hope, and God's amazing grace. She fell asleep in my arms and quietly slipped away to paradise.
There will be no more doctors. No more nurses. No more hospitals. No more pricks and pokes. No more wires. No more tubes. No more crying. No more pain. She's all better now. My sweet baby girl is now resting in the Savior's loving arms waiting for her loved ones to meet her there some day. Even though her life was short, she touched many lives. I know that she brought Bill and I closer to God, and have been told of her doing the same for others. I thank God for the short but sweet life of my baby girl and I can't wait for the day that I will get to go to heaven and see her again. Until then, sleep sweet my sweet little Laynie girl.
January 15, 2008 - 24 weeks old!
Laynie passed away today about 12:30 AM. She was being rocked, sung to, talked to, cuddled, kissed, and hugged while she fell asleep and quietly went away to be with Jesus. I like to think of her curled up on Jesus' lap waiting for her Mommy and Daddy to meet her in heaven. Although we miss her very much, we are so happy that she is finally well. No more tubes! No more wires! No more doctors! No more nurses! No more pricks and pokes! No more pain! She's all better now!
January 6, 2008 - 5 months old!
Laynie has not been weighed since she went into the hospital last week. She is doing better, but she is still a very sick little girl. She may be in the hospital 3 to 4 weeks, or even longer if she needs a more extensive treatment.
December 31, 2007 - 21 weeks! Laynie weighs 7 lbs 7 oz. She is in the hospital in the pediatric ICU with pneumonia. She is on a ventilator and getting medicine to help her pulminary pressure. She will probably have to be in the hospital for another week or two.
December 22, 2007 - 19 1/2 weeks old!
Laynie weighs 6 lbs 10 oz and is 19 1/2 inches long. She looks like she has grown so much this week. She is slowly starting to add fullness to her face, and she is starting to get a little belly.
December 15, 2007 - 18 1/2 weeks old!
Laynie is back home. She weighs 6 lbs. 6 oz. She is 19 inches long. She is doing better. Her pulminary pressure is still too high for her to have surgery. She has a feeding tube that goes down into her intestine and she still gets bottles when she wants them. She may be needing to go to a different hospital in where they have the proper equipment to handle her surgery if the pressure does not come down on the medication.
December 8, 2007 - 4 months old!
Laynie is constantly gaining weight. She is up to 6 lbs 2 oz. She is 18 1/2 inches long. She is on oxygen to help her pulminary pressure, and has a temporary feeding tube. She will be having surgery next week to put in a G-tube (a feeding tube straight into her belly). They said that he pulminary pressure will get better with the oxygen and as she grows. Right now her veins are so small it is difficult for the blood to flow through them.
December 1, 2007 - 16 1/2 weeks old!
Laynie started losing weight this week, and has been hospitalized again. She weighs 5 lbs 6 oz. She is still 18 inches long. They have put in a feeding tube and done an upper GI serries. She has a nonrotation of the smaller intestine. It is not causing problems yet, but it could some day. They are talking about fixing this while they are putting in a more permanent feeding tube. She has a surgical consult on Monday.
November 24, 2007 - 15 1/2 weeks old!
Laynie is slowly gaining weight. She gained 4 oz in 5 days last week which was an improvement from last week, so they didn't put her in the hospital. She now weighs 5 lbs 8 oz. She is 17 inches long. She is slowly gaining weight, very slowly.
November 17, 2007 - 14 1/2 weeks old!
Laynie weighs 5 lbs. 4 oz. She is 17 inches long. She has another weight check on Wednesday to see if she is gaining enough weight. They are talking about putting her into the Children's Hospital at the University Hospital if she doesn't start gaining weight faster. We've tried so many different things including giving her a higher calorie formula.
November 6, 2007 - 13 weeks old!
Laynie weighs 5 lbs. She is 16 inches long. She has been to see Dr. Eskridge and he wants her to try to eat 45 cc every 3 - 4 hours. She has only been eating 35 - 45 every 4 - 5 hours. He said that we just needed to do our best to encourage her to eat as much as possible every time she eats. Again, as long as she is gaining decent weight she is okay; if not, they will probably have to surgically put a tube into her belly to help her eat. However, she is staying with Grandma, Grandpa, Uncle Dave, and Aunt Mel while we are with Eddie at the hospital. Eddie was fattened up while with them, maybe she will be too!
October 30, 2007 - 12 weeks old! Laynie weighs 4 lbs. 9 oz. She is 16 inches long. She is taking 40 - 60 cc every 3 - 4 hours. Laynie loves being home. She loves her swing and cuddling with her brother. She has several follow-up doctors appointments in November and December.
October 23, 2007 - 11 weeks old!
Laynie weighs 4 lbs. 4 oz. and is 17 inches long. She is taking 30 - 40 cc every 3 - 3 1/2 hours. Her box temp has been raised and dropped this week. She is now at 29.3. She can't go home until she is able to hold her body temp, but she can't hold her body temp without body fat, and she can't get body fat unless she starts eating more.
October 16, 2007 - 10 weeks old!
Laynie is about the same. She is in no hurry to come home. She also had her immunizations this week. Because of that they have reduced her bottles. She now gets two bottles to every tube feed. She weighs 3 lbs. 15 oz. and is 16 1/2 inches long. She is starting to really enjoy being held and loved on. Before she just kind of tolerated it, but now she will even cuddle with you.
October 9, 2007 - 9 weeks old!
Laynie is making slow progress. I would love to see her progress faster, but she doesn't seem to be in any hurry to come home. She weighs 3 lbs. 14 oz. and is 15 3/4 inches long. She is taking 33 cc every 3 hours, although she could take more if she wanted to. She is still on a little bit of oxygen, and her box temperature is set at 29.4.
October 2, 2007 - 8 weeks old! Laynie is doing well. She is making slow progress. She weighs 3 lbs. 8 oz. She is 15 inches long. She is taking 32 cc every 3 hours. She is getting a bottle for every 2 feeds that she takes through the feeding tube. She is still on a little bit of oxygen, and we were told to expect that she would probably go home on oxygen.
September 25, 2007 - 7 weeks old! Laynie weighs 3 lbs. 5 oz. She is getting 32 cc every three hours. She is getting two bottle feeds twice daily. She was off of all oxygen for a couple of days, but because she was desatting so many times they put her back on her FlowPap, fluids, and pulse ox monitor. They heard a murmur in her heart Sunday night. They did an EKG and have discovered three ventricular holes in the inner wall of her heart. They believe that they are small enough to close on their own, but they will need monitoring. They gave her another blood transfusion today. She is doing better now that she has the extra blood.
September 18, 2007 - 6 weeks old!
Laynie weighs 3lbs. and is 15 inches long. She is getting 25 cc every three hours. She only gets one bottle feed a day, but has been having trouble with it. They are doing a swallow test to see if she is swallowing correctly, or if they need to wait on the bottle feeding. She is still on FlowPap with just the slightest bit of oxygen due to the desaturations she has been having during bottle feedings.
September 11, 2007 - 5 weeks old! Laynie weighs 2 lbs. 8 oz. and is 14 inches long. She is getting 23 cc every 3 hours. She also is getting one bottle feeding a day. She took 12cc from her bottle today, which is so much better than the 2-3 cc she had been taking. They have also dropped the temperature in her box so that she is wearing clothing. When the temperature setting on the box is 28 she'll be able to be in an open box which is one step closer to going home. Her settings right now are 30. They have also dropped her FlowPap to a 1, which is almost nothing, and she may be off of that soon too! It was so hard to leave her behind and take Eddie home, but it makes us look forward to the day we get to bring them both home so much more!
September 4, 2007 - 4 weeks old! Laynie is weighing 2 lbs. 6 oz. She is back on her SiPap machine, but they do not think she will be on it long. They think that she just got a little too tired and needed a little break. They also tested her to make sure she wasn't getting pneumonia, which she isn't. She had another blood transfusion to get her red blood cell count up. She also had an eye exam today and her eyes are also growing right on schedule. I got to hold and console her after her exam. It was so nice to snuggle with her and let her know that everything was alright!!
August 28, 2007 - 3 weeks old! Laynie is weighing 1 lb. 15 oz. She is getting 12 cc every 2 hours. She is on tube feeds only. They took the rate off of her SiPap machine. The rate is a pulse that forces air into her lungs to inflate them. This gives her a rythm of breathing. By turning off the rate, this forces her to make her own rythm. This is the first step in getting her off of the SiPap machine and getting her onto a FlowPap. A FlowPap is an oxygen tube that runs under her nose. It is very similar to the SiPap, but less sophistocated. It will move her one step closer to breathing on her own.
August 21, 2007 - 2 weeks old! Laynie is weighing 1 lb. 13oz. She is taking 4 cc every 3 hours through her feeding tube. She is still on the SiPap machine. She had to have a blood transfusion tonight. Her red blood cells were a little low. This is probably because of all the blood testing they have to do. Because she is so tiny any blood that they take would drop her red blood cell levels. The extra blood would not only boost her levels, but it will help beef her up so that maybe she will be strong enough to get off the SiPap within a couple of days. Her blood type is O+, like mine.
August 14, 2007 - 1 week old! Laynie is still not taking formula until she can poop without assistance. Laynie is still on the SiPap machine giving her room air as well as oxygen at times. She is having apnea episodes every once in a while, but again, we were told that is normal for a baby her size. We got to hold Laynie for the first time today! She started having apnea episodes right before we were supposed to hold her. I was afraid that they might change their mind about letting me hold her, but they didn't. In fact, after they gave her to me, she stopped having the episodes. The nurses teased that maybe she was just trying to get attention and decided that the episodes were the best way of getting it until I held her. It was a relief to leave knowing that she was calm and ready to sleep after we left. Her chromosome testing came back today. The results were normal! The doctors do not really know what to think!